Okay, it’s not so much a “turn” of events as a little ripple that could qualify as a potential wave…
The other day mom confronted me at lunch. She asked about my visiting “friend”, then sneakily squeezed in the topic of LGBT and our orientation. She caught me off guard, and I wasn’t prepared at all for the conversation, throughout which my heart felt like it had jumped out of my chest and been served as a dish on the table.
My face probably turned white as she asked if my girlfriend seemed ‘strange’ or ‘weird’ to me (I knew what she meant). I pulled myself together and quickly said, “no”, hoping that she’d drop the sudden accusation. But she kept going: “How about you? Are you…?”
“No!” (I wasn’t ready for the consequences if I had said yes – I panicked!) The conversation went on: she asked if I supported gay rights.
“Of course!” I said. And she frowned. “A lot of my friends are gay!” as if that was my only justification for it… “I work in theatre and film; there’s a lot of queer people in my field,” I tried to explain to her how important making connection are in the industry. She said, “But you should stick to you beliefs. They’re ‘wrong’ and you should stay away from the people that can influence you in a bad way. You should live your life according to the Bible. The Bible says homosexuality is wrong, and you should stay away from that.”
Out of my desperation, I used Obama as an argument: “Obama’s a Christian who supports gay rights!” And you know what her comeback was? “That’s why the world is so messed up right now!”
I didn’t know what to say to her. At this point I thought it was better to keep silent so I can get out of there asap. But I wanted to scream “well if you support Obama, you support him supporting gay rights!!!” (because she IS an Obama supporter).
In the end, there’s no easy way to tell my mom that, 1) I could care less about what the Bible says, let alone live a life that’s pleasing to God, 2) I don’t want to go to church, 3) I like girls , 4) I have a girlfriend; and 5) I am sexually active. I think she’s going to have a heart attack.
All this pressure to suddenly come clean to my mom has just dawned on me with the anticipation of my girlfriend’s month-long visit in 5 days. I feel so hopeless and helpless… at least in less than a week’s time, my babei will be in my arms…
Where's My Dime? 